I found this gem on a website called She Is More.
It is fabulous advice that I wish more girls of all ages – not just teens, would know and follow.
Definitely share this post with your girlfriends!

21 Lost Lady Traditions That Still Apply Today

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Acting like a lady is carrying yourself with dignity, which also empowers a man to be a gentleman.

Many of us want a true gentleman, but I believe we hold the power to the way we are treated in our hands. It’s the law of attraction and common sense: If we want a gentleman, we must be and act like a lady.

In all areas of life, I believe being a lady displays self-respect, class, appreciation and etiquette. It also allows you to enjoy the niceties of life with the ease of knowing how to act in all situations. You don’t have to come from wealth or be wealthy in order to conduct yourself like royalty.

After doing some new research and also recalling my southern roots which included cotillion and etiquette classes, here are 21 lost lady like traditions that still apply today:

Manners:

1. If a man knows that it is etiquette to remain standing until you are seated, be sure to sit promptly as to not leave him standing too long.

2. No rude or shocking language, especially at the table. Your language is a representation of your mind and heart.

3. Don’t talk with your mouth full. I don’t need to explain this one.

4. She dresses tastefully: A lady dresses appropriately for the occasion.

5. Phone calls: When in doubt, a good rule of thumb is not to make phone calls before 9 am or after 9 pm.

6. She is gracious: She never just says, “hello” when being introduced to someone. She offers a kind greeting like, “it’s a pleasure to meet you” or “how are you this evening?”

7. She turns her phone on silent and puts it away for meals, meetings and church.

8. She says, “yes, please” or “no, thank you.” She does not say, “yep” or “nope.”

9. She gives compliments with sincerity and only when she means it. She does not say things just to say them. Insincerity is easier to read than we think.

10. A lady offers to help someone in need. Being a lady starts with how you treat yourself and others. She offers her seat to the elderly, disabled or a parent with small children.

11. She RSVPs promptly, reads an invitation thoroughly and does not ask for exceptions. She always promptly sends a detailed thank you note to anyone who has shown her hospitality.

12. She never arrives empty handed. Bringing a small hostess gift shows your appreciation for the preparation your host has done.

13. Her word is her bond. A lady warrants a respectable reputation purely by the consistency of her word. She always keeps her promises.

The Dating Lady:

14. Don’t call him, he’ll call you. A lady knows that she deserves to be pursued and does not do it or him. If you are in the position that you have to initiate contact in order to communicate, then you should know that you are not dealing with a gentleman and can move on.

15. Time frame: no one gets to call you on a whim to hang out. Your time is precious and valuable and you are clearly booked days in advance. Someone who honors your time will plan ahead and ask to take you out with at least a 48 hour request.

16. You don’t meet a guy anywhere. He comes and picks you up, especially on the first date. It can be inconvenient, but is it your job to make dating you convenient? No. The last thing you want to be is convenient. However if  you are meeting someone in person for the first time, meeting in a neutral location is a smart, safe move. Always honor your intuition.

17. Curfew: Mama always said nothing good happens past 10 o’ clock and she’s pretty much right. So set the time you need to be home in advance and let your gentleman know about it ahead of time.

18. Appreciation: Being a lady and acting lady-like does not mean that you are entitled or snobby. Practice having a heart of gratitude and always say thank you for specific actions or generosities.

19. How to order: Have respect for your gentleman and do not behave with entitlement by ordering the most expensive thing on the menu. If he wants to treat you to a fine bottle of wine, he can order it or offer for you to make a selection.

20. Be a good listener and conversationalist. Put your phone away and be present. A lady is not boring, rude or dismissive.

21. Be prepared. If you are going out with a gentleman, he will cover your date. However, you should always be prepared to pay if the date does not go well or he forgets his wallet. The gentleman version of this article on GoodGuySwag.com says,

“An English gentleman never split the meal with his date. The English used the term “go dutch” in “derisive application,” as they stereotyped the Dutch as being cheap, or “stingy.” Today, the gentleman always picks up the tab, especially on the first date, and with no expectations.”

30 Characteristics of a Modern Lady explains that ultimately etiquette is the natural byproduct that flows through a lady’s character. These traditions are mostly common- sense that simply allow you and others to enjoy life more.

If this article intrigued you, please share to inspire others.

Related Post: 30 Important Things Every Girl Should Know

A reader just commented with another important point:

22. Sit like a lady. When sitting, your legs if not together, should not be so far apart that others can see  your nether regions. You cannot expect to be treated with respect by others  if you are treating yourself disrespectfully.

Do you have any summer drinks parties coming up? Are you always looking for cool finger food ideas for your parties? Well look no further because I’ve got you covered! Bruschetta make the perfect cocktail party/soiree food. They are filling, so your guests aren’t left hungry, they look pretty, they compliment a variety of wines and are incredibly easy.

I love throwing together some plates of bruschetta or a bruschetta bar when I’m entertaining, especially for a last minute get together.

When we are in Italy on a Glam Italia Tour we do this a lot. You will often find us at the end of the day up on the balcony with a plate of bruschetta, some prosecco and a view of the Bay of Naples. It’s fabulously quick and madly chic!

Before we get into making bruschetta, lets learn how to say it correctly. It’s not broo-shetta.

The correct pronunciation is bruss-KETT-ah.

My friends over at gifts.com sent me this post. I don’t have any affiliate marketing with them, and the post is not sponsored or paid for.

How To Build Your Own Bruschetta Bar

If you’re hosting a party, you’re probably worried about what food to serve that won’t leave your guests hungry. That’s why bruschetta, makes for the perfect finger food for your next party. It’s more filling than cheese and crackers, but still isn’t as formal as a dinner party and requires far less preparation.

Though typical bruschetta just has tomatoes and olive oil, you can set up a bruschetta bar station where guests choose from a variety of toppings. Read on to see all the different ways you can serve up bruschetta and impress your friends at your next soiree!

bruschetta

What is bruschetta?

Bruschetta is toasted bread drizzled in olive oil that is typically served as an antipasto, the first course in an Italian meal. It is often topped with garlic and tomatoes, though if you are setting up a bruschetta bar, you’ll find there are many different ways you can serve bruschetta.

How to build your bruschetta bar

Step 1: Prepare the bruschetta bread

The best bread for bruschetta is typically a rustic Italian bread, though a baguette or sourdough bread will also work. Once you’ve selected your bread, you’ll want to toast it for serving.

First, cut your bread it into small slices, then brush olive oil on both sides. Place them in an oven set to 450°F for 5-6 minutes. Alternatively, you can toast the bread without olive oil and put olive oil and garlic on top of the bread once it is toasted, or even grill the bread instead of toasting it for an authentic Italian touch.

RELATED POST: HOW TO MAKE ITALIAN COFFEE IN A MOKA

Step 2: Choose your bruschetta toppings

Types of spreads for your bruschetta bar

bruschetta pairings

Bruschetta is typically topped with fresh tomatoes and basil, but if you are creating a bruschetta bar you can offer much more variety. Stray away from typical tomatoes with different jams, vegetables and other spreads.

Cannellini or white beans: A sprinkle of minced garlic and olive oil can also make a delicious combination. For extra protein, sprinkle some pancetta on top.

  • Pairs with: minced garlic, olive oil, Italian spices

Marinated or sauteed vegetables: Vegetables offer many different options for toppings. Options like zucchini or eggplant are easy choices that only need a little seasoning.

  • Pairs with: feta cheese, red pepper flakes

Pesto: Both basil pesto and sun-dried tomato pesto can be used as a spread for your bruschetta bar. Neither pesto should be combined with sweeter flavors.

  • Pairs with: parmesan, salami

Red onion jam: Red onion jam offers a sweet and tart flavor that other spreads may not. Onion jams pair well with sliced meats and herbs. They shouldn’t be combined with sweeter flavors like fruits. Additionally, you can serve caramelized onions instead of red onion jam.

  • Pairs with: sliced meats, parsley, oregano

Tapenade: Tapenade is made up of finely chopped or pureed olives, making it a great substitute for real olives at your bruschetta bar.

  • Pairs with: salmon and mascarpone

Tomato: The classic tomato and basil combination is an absolute must at your bruschetta bar. To make this classic recipe, chop up the tomatoes and toss them in olive oil, garlic and balsamic vinegar. When serving, sprinkle basil on top. You can also mix up what tomatoes you use to offer more subtle variants.

  • Pairs with: olive oil, thyme, basil and oregano

Types of meat for your bruschetta bar

bruschetta meat pairings

Adding meat to your bruschetta offers a great compliment to different spreads and makes the snack more filling if you’re only serving appetizers or finger foods. Feel free to stray away from typical Italian meats in favor of your favorites.

Coppa: Coppa is pork shoulder sliced paper thin with a strong paprika taste.

  • Pairs with: harder cheeses, like parmesan

Pancetta: The Italian version of bacon, pancetta is a thicker prosciutto rolled up and cured with pepper. It has a robust, meaty flavor.

  • Pairs with: mushrooms or vegetables

Prosciutto: There are two types of prosciutto—one from Spain and one from Italy. While both are absolutely delicious, if you want to stick with Italian flavors for your bruschetta bar, it’s best to go with the Italian prosciutto. This prosciutto is usually more thinly sliced and aromatic, making it perfect for bruschetta.

  • Pairs with: mozzarella, balsamic vinegar

Salami: Salami can be from either pork or beef, and usually has a sweet, salty flavor with notes of pepper that complements other savory flavors.

  • Pairs with: tapenade, olives and all cheeses

Smoked salmon: Smoked salmon is salmon that has been cured either hot or cold and requires no additional preparation on your end. It has a smoky flavor, differentiating it from most of the meats above.

  • Pairs with: creamy cheeses and fruits like apples and pears

Types of cheese for your bruschetta bar

bruschetta cheese pairings

Everyone loves cheese, so adding a few types of cheese to your bruschetta bar gives your guests a great chance to mix things up and opt for different flavors. Italian cheeses are always a safe bet, but if you have other options you like more, those can be substituted. A few non-Italian options have been included below.

RELATED POST: HOW TO MAKE A CHARCUTERIE BOARD

Brie: With a nutty, earthy flavor, brie is often a crowd favorite for soft cheeses. It also makes for a great alternative should you be unable to find burrata or other soft Italian cheeses.

  • Pairs with: honey and fruit jams

Burrata: Burrata is an Italian buffalo milk cheese with a creamy and soft texture, making it easy to spread onto your bread. Made of mozzarella and cream, burrata has a thick outer curd that, when sliced open, reveals a buttery, soft cheese.

  • Pairs with: fruits or tomatoes and olive oil

Feta cheese: Feta is a Greek cheese with a salty and briny flavor. It can be served at your bruschetta bar crumbled into a bowl or served as is.

  • Pairs with: juicy tomatoes, vegetables and sweet fruits like pears or peaches

Goat cheese: Goat cheese is a type of cheese made from goat’s milk. It has a soft, crumbly texture with a strong, pungent flavor. Like with feta, you can crumble it into a bowl for easy serving.

  • Pairs with: eggplant and most meats

Gorgonzola: Gorgonzola is a sharp, Italian cheese that can be either crumbly or firm. It is often compared to bleu cheese, and can be substituted with said cheese if needed. Given its strong flavor, be sure to separate gorgonzola from other cheeses so it won’t transfer its flavor.

  • Pairs with: tomatoes, arugula and other Italian herbs

Mascarpone: Mascarpone is an Italian cream cheese that is used in desserts, but can often be used to substitute butter as well.

  • Pairs with: apples, berries or whipped with fresh herbs

Mozzarella: Mozzarella cheese has a semi-soft texture and can be made from either cow or buffalo milk. It has a creamy, milky flavor, though you can opt for smoked mozzarella for a smoky taste.

  • Pairs with: pesto, salami and other meats

Parmesan: Parmesan is a flavorful, hard Italian cheese with a fruity, nutty taste to it. It is typically aged for about two years and inferior versions of this cheese can have a bitter taste, so consider that when deciding which cheese to add to your bar.

  • Pairs with: coppa, prosciutto and salami

Ricotta: Ricotta cheese is made up of leftover mozzarella. It’s creamy and fresh with a slightly sweet flavor. Additionally, don’t hesitate to put burrata, mozzarella and ricotta on your board as it gives guests different texture options!

  • Pairs with: sweet jams, meats and vegetables

Additional bruschetta toppings

bruschetta toppings

Beyond cheese, meat and different spreads, there are various toppings to consider leaving for your guests to add to their bruschetta. Be sure to include at least a few spices so people can add a sprinkle of flavor to their bruschetta as well as one type of nut and fruit to give people variety.

Condiments: balsamic vinegar, honey, fruit jams, marinara sauce

Fruits: avocado, dates, dried fruits, figs, grapes, olives, sliced apples or pears

Herbs and spices: arugula, basil, black pepper, Himalayan sea salt, minced garlic, oregano, parsley, scallions, red pepper, rosemary, thyme

Nuts: hazelnuts, pine nuts, pistachios, sliced almonds

Step 3: Select your wines

It’s not a bruschetta bar without wine! Both red and white wines will do, though it is best to consider what type of cheeses you are serving for the most complementary flavors. Provide a variety for guests of both reds and whites, unless you know there is a unanimous preference.

Below are some common options that complement most of the cheeses mentioned above.

bruschetta wine pairings

Step 4: Prepare your bruschetta bar

After you’ve picked out the various spreads, toppings and other garnishes you want to serve, you’ll want to prepare them to be served at your bruschetta bar so people can easily serve themselves.

If you’re making your own spreads, like the classic tomato and basil or homemade tapenade, you’ll want to do this before the party so you can keep things fresh. For things that can be preserved in a jar, like jams or pesto, you can even make or buy these ahead of time.

30-45 minutes before the party starts, set out the cheese so it can warm to room temperature by the time guests eat it. Open up any wines that need time to aerate and chop up bruschetta toppings that need additional preparation. Once you’re ready to prepare your bruschetta bar, gather all the different toppings and spreads and lay them out on either a cheese board, cutting board or several large plates.

You can separate based on flavor, such as a savory plate and a sweet plate, or organize each plate based on suggested combinations. For instance, you can have one plate with a traditional bruschetta spread of tomatoes, olive oil and basil and another plate with goat cheese, fig jam and proscuitto. It’s up to you and what you think your guests will prefer!

REALTED POST: 21 LOST LADY TRADITIONS THAT STILL APPLY TODAY

Bruschetta recipes

BRUSCHETTA RECIPES

Besides the classic tomato and basil combination, it may be difficult to know what tastes best with on bruschetta. That’s why we’ve curated some of our favorite bruschetta recipes for you to create when you set up your bar.

With all the toppings for your bruschetta bar, you’ll need several plates for all the cheeses, meats and other spices you’re serving. Opt for a fun slate cheeseboard so you can write out all the yummy different things you’re serving so guests know exactly what they’re trying. Not only is it decorative and useful, but you’re sure to use it time and time again during other housewarming parties.

Looking for cool plates, cutting boards and serving accoutrements? You can find some fabulous ideas here at gifts.com

If you enjoyed this post you can find more like it at gifts.com/blog.

How To Build self Respect

The most important thing a girl can have is self respect. When you treat yourself with respect others will view you and treat you accordlingly. A girl who respects herself is an ideal employee, friend and companion. You deserve all the great things that life has to offer, and that starts with treating yourself with respect.

10 Ways To Build Your Self Respect.

Learn To Say No.

This applies to every aspect of your life. Anything, and I do mean anything you don’t feel comfortable with, say No. If someone wants you to do something that you don’t want to do, say No. Don’t give up your personal time to make someone else happy – if you don’t want to go to lunch or to the movies or to the mall, just say No. When you feel like someone is taking advantage of you don’t grin and bear it. Say No.

Set Boundaries.

When you are clear with yourself what your boundaries are it becomes easy to enforce them. Set boundaries that don’t let others steal your time. Set boundaries that rule how people can and cannot speak to you. Set boundaries about physical violence and verbal violence – neither are ever okay.

Set boundaries about how much overtime you will do at work. Set boundaries that you won’t answer the phone at dinner, or respond to texts during movies. Set boundaries about how late or how early others can call you.

Having a clearly defined set of boundaries is a crucial foundation in building self respect. Quietly and calmly enforcing the boundaries you have set is a sign that you are worthy and that you have a solid sense of self respect.

RELATED POST: HOW TO BUILD YOUR SELF CONFIDENCE

Podcasts and Books.

Feed your mind with quality information. Don’t waste your life on reality TV – listen to podcasts on subjects that interest you. Read books on a variety of subjects including guides to self empowerment, to help you stay on track. The more you fill your mind with quality information the better you will feel about yourself.

Choose Who You Allow Around You.

Be very discerning about who you let around you. Don’t hang out with negative people, people who treat you unkindly, or people heading down a bad path. Instead surround yourself with positive, kind people who treat you well and are heading in a positive direction.

Treat People Kindly.

Self respect is equal parts how you treat yourself and how you treat others. Be kind. It’s easy, it feels good and it makes those around you feel good. Like attracts like, so if you are kind to others you will attract kind people to you. Treat yourself kindly too. Learn to only say nice words to yourself about yourself.

RELATED POST: HOW TO BEAT STRESS

Acknowledge your strengths.

Self respect means knowing what you are good at and acknowledging those strengths to yourself. You don’t need to broadcast them to the world – others will see for themselves. No one is good at everything, so rather than focusing on the things you are not so good at, and beating yourself up over them, put them in context and pair them with strengths. Maybe you can’t run a 3 minute mile but you are really good at conjugating verbs in another language, or baking pies or calming distressed animals. Know what you are good at and embrace those things.

Pursue Hobbies.

Get some hobbies and pursue them. Hobbies are a way to devote quality time to something you enjoy, which is a sign of self respect in itself! Blocking off time for yourself to do things that you really enjoy is a way of showing the world that you respect yourself.

Dress With Self Respect/Dress For You.

Only ever dress for yourself. Don’t dress to try and get a guy’s attention or to make him like you. The way you dress and the way you present yourself send out a thousand silent messages that in turn tell others how to treat you and what to think of you. Are you sending out a message that says you are willing, ready and able? Are you giving a message that says you can be compromised? Or are you telling the world that you are comfortable in your own skin and know what you’ve got, but only the chosen get to see it? Dress yourself with respect.

RELATED POST: 21 LOST LADY TRADITIONS THAT STILL APPLY TODAY

Set Standards.

Raise the bar high! Set high standards for yourself and for everything in your life, and then work to achieve and maintain those standards. Set standards for behavior you will accept in others and in yourself. You will be amazed at how many people will raise themselves up to meet you, and in the process the ones that were dragging you down will drop away. The ultimate sign of healthy self respect is holding yourself to a high standard.

Do not engage in gossip.

Gossiping is the opposite of holding yourself to a high standard. Gossip is about making yourself feel good by demeaning another person. If you have self respect or if you are building your self respect, excuse yourself from any conversation that involves gossip. In fact, make a habit of shutting down any conversation that involves gossiping about other people.

 

She remembered who she was and the game changed” Lalah Deliah

image from Luca Magazine, photographed by Brad Olson